Let’s Not Make This Awkward!
Sometimes it’s hard to talk to people in social situations. They ask you a question and you aren’t sure how to answer it, so you come up with an awkward response. Later, you think of what you really meant to say. Finances can be like that sometimes. Thinking about what you meant to do or say after the fact is not helpful.
You might buy something really expensive without talking to your spouse first. You go out with a group of friends but aren’t sure if you are splitting the tab or getting separate checks. If you are on a limited budget and go out with people who like to order big drinks and the most expensive entrees, splitting the check equally can be awkward. A relative invites you on a vacation, but it’s much more expensive than you thought it would be yet they expect you to pay your part. A friend asks you to be in their wedding in a foreign country but you just started a new job and have no vacation. These situations can make you feel uncomfortable and awkward and not sure what you are supposed to say or do.
As the old saying goes, honesty is the best policy. If you are trying to take control of your spending, having a conversation up front is usually the best way to deal with things. Waiting to say anything or just spending the money and feeling resentment about it can lead to more problems in the relationships. Here are some suggestions to help prevent awkward financial situations.
Have an agreement with your significant other that any spending over $xxxx that you will discuss before purchasing. If you do overspend on something and it jeopardizes your financial well-being, consider returning it.
When going out with friends or family, say “we’d like separate checks please,” right at the beginning so there is no confusion or awkwardness at the end.
Be honest with your family member that you’d love to go on vacation with them, but that flight, hotel or destination just doesn’t fit into your budget right now. Maybe you could compromise on a less expensive location or time of the year.
Wedding conversations are hard. You’ll need to consider the friendship and your job security here. If you really want to make it work, ask your new employer if you can take the time as unpaid time off. Otherwise, you may want to opt out of the wedding with your sincerest apologies and get them an amazing wedding gift instead!
It is perfectly okay and healthy to set boundaries and stick to them when it comes to your finances. Setting boundaries with yourself and others can be a great way to help you stay on track towards your goals.
Being prepared and talking about things at the beginning instead of waiting to deal with them can help take the awkwardness away. Face things head-on and don’t procrastinate as burying your feelings will not help your finances. Talking things out in a respectful and kind way will hopefully help prevent either party from feeling bad about the situation.
